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How would you propose marriage to someone? Think for a second. I wouldn’t do it in my gym clothes, that’s for sure. I also wouldn’t do it while in the supermarket looking for vegetables.

If you want to propose marriage to someone, you will dress up nice, take your loved one to a beautiful location and do it there. The key here is that you take your time and do it right.

Your tour description is THE moment where you propose marriage to your potential customer – a marriage of their money and your wallet! It is when you set yourself apart and make them rush to choose YOU and no one else. In earlier posts on this blog, I talked about using keywords in your descriptions and writing rich copy, even SEO-optimised copy. Let’s dive in a little deeper.

Writing out a basic description is not enough. Unless you are in the middle of nowhere, you have competition. Even if you are the only person offering your specific tour, they will always have other options. You need to write with detail and follow the principle of ‘more is more’. Less is more may apply to some things, but it most DEFINITELY does not apply to tour descriptions. Detail helps, but it must be structured and clean. Having it all tied up into a beautifully branded package(opens in a new tab) doesn’t hurt either and we can help with that.

Escapegoat.com.au(opens in a new tab) includes as much detail as possible.

Follow the ‘BETTER’ Method to write a great description, and you will be WAY ahead of the pack.

Basic Breakdown: Start out your summary with a basic breakdown and bullet points of the major attractions you are going to including the price, starting point and other basic details.

Exhibit the Experience: Lay out in great detail the tour while keeping the curiosity factor. Use sub-headlines and short paragraphs to break up the information, and include photos so people can see what they are getting.

Short and sweet will NOT help you sell. It’s a myth. People are risking their holiday experience with you. Go into a good amount of detail.

You need to structure this correctly in order for it to work, though. Massive chunks of text? Heck no. You’ll just overwhelm people, and their eyes will glaze over quicker than you can say Dunkin’ Donuts. My recommended structure for a one column design is typically this:

Small Intro -> Bullet Points -> Exhibit the Experience -> Photo Gallery -> Additional Detail (for those who are looking to confirm a specific thing) -> Exhibit Your Expertise -> Testimonials -> FAQs (do you allow children? etc.)

It seems like a lot of info to put up, but most people will stop scrolling once they hit the photo gallery. Those who have additional questions will typically keep going until they find the answer they need.

Tick Their Boxes: What do people need to know? Do you cater to disabled people? Children? Are meals included? What do they need to bring? Are admission fees included? Have you listed literally every single place you go to? Who knows what your potential guest has in mind! Get it all out on your site.

Testimonials: Include testimonials you have received for that specific tour. Make sure the testimonials reference specific highlights of your tour rather than the generic ‘we loved it!’ type of testimonials that one sees around. Include photos (or videos) where possible. There is a bunch of review platforms out there so we’ve discussed which review sites you should test out.

Expertise: In your description, demonstrate your specific expertise that makes the tour magic — how your local knowledge gives YOU insider secrets and history that they could never tap into anywhere else.

Reservation: At the bottom of your description, have a call to action – a gigantic button, a contact form, a calendar of availability – to guide people to book. Whatever it is, the end of your description should flow into the exact action you want your website visitor to take.


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